Can I boi you a poi?

Firstly, please accept my apologies for the lack of photos to accompany this recipe.  I made it to feed a very hungry husband who had been out climbing Pen Y Fan in the snow and he ate it too fast for photo ops.

Pies are fabby warming winter food, and readymade pastry makes them quick and easy.  I don't have the patience to stand and fold and roll my own puff pastry whilst a hungry, wailing toddler attempts to scale my trouser leg, so I make no apologise for my addiction to Jus Rol.  Jus don't buy the new low fat puff one.  It's not 30% less fat, it's 90% less nice. 


The post title is inspired by a friend of mine who shall remain nameless, but knows who she is.  In our young, free, single, drunken days she was once famously chatted up in a 2am chip shop queue by an Australian backpacker who led with the classy "Noice tits luv.  Can I boi you a poi?".  It makes me chuckle every time I make a pie and I am happy to share the mirth.

So, a yummy, creamy, warming chicken pie then?  Of course.

Chicken, mushroom and bacon pie

400g chicken, breast or thigh fillet, chopped
1 small punnet mushrooms, chopped
6 thick rashers smoked bacon, chopped
1 onion, finely chopped
approx 2 dessertspoons softened butter or spread
approx 2 dessertspoons plain flour
1 pint chicken stock
1/4 pint milk
tsp mustard seeds
2 tsp chopped garlic (approx 4 cloves)
1/2 tsp crushed black pepper
1 pack ready rolled puff pastry
Olive oil

In a large pan, heat a splash of oil and fry off the onions and chopped bacon.  Set aside in a dish.  Repeat and brown the chicken and mushrooms together, cookig for about 5 minutes, stirring frequently.  Pop in the dish with the onions.

Return the pan to the heat, melt your butter and add your flour, cooking for a minute or two until the paste starts to turn golden and smells nutty.  Start adding the liquid a bit at a time - milk first, until it's all gone, then start with the stock.  Stir briskly between each addition as the sauce thickens and cooks - keep stirring and lumps will disappear, I promise.  When all the liquid is added, throw in the garlic, pepper and mustard seeds and simmer for about five minutes until thick.  Add in the contents of your bowl of chicken and whatnot, stir together then tip into an ovenproof dish and top with the pastry, cut to size.  Brush with a little milk or beaten egg to glaze and bake for 15-18 minutes in a hot (200, 180 fan) oven until gold and puffed and delicious.  Serve with vegetables of your pleasing.



You'll be pleased to know that the chat up line didn't work, incidentally.  I mean, would you?

Beef pie

I make a slowcooker and a non-slowcooker version of this hearty pie.  I'll share the slowcooker version here, as it's what I made yesterday, and the other I'll share another time. 

You can throw the carrots into the slowcooker with the beef if you like, I like them a little al dente so cook them just before putting the pies in the oven, it only takes ten minutes.

Feeds 2 adults and 2 small people.

1 pack lean casserole steak, approx 500g
3-4 sticks of celery, finely sliced
1 red onion, finely sliced
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1tsp ground black pepper
1tsp dried mixed herbs
2-3 carrots
1 beef stock cube
gravy granules, cornflour or thickening granules
1 pack ready rolled puff pastry
1 egg and splash of milk, beaten together

Put the beef, onion, celery, garlic, herbs, pepper and stock cube in the slowcooker with a mugful of boiling water.  Cook on low for 7-8 hours.

to serve:

Cut the carrots into chunks and boil for 10 minutes. Drain, reserving the water.  Stir into the beef mix.  Thicken the liquid with cornflour, thickening granules or a little gravy granules (if serving to babies, avoid using gravy, as it ramps up the salt content; if you need to add another stock cube for flavour try to use a reduced salt version).  If more gravy is needed, use the cooking water from the carrots and thicken accordingly.  Tip into a pie dish, cut a lid to fit from the rolled puff pastry, brush with the egg wash and bake in a hot oven for 15-20 minutes until puffed up and golden brown.

Serve with peas or mixed vegetables.

You can make one big pie, or individual pies if you have a selection of dishes.  I am fortunate enough to have some charmingly 50's-retro Mason Cash pie dishes, so I get to make big pies and baby pies, thus...

Cute, no?