Firstly, please accept my apologies for the lack of photos to accompany this recipe. I made it to feed a very hungry husband who had been out climbing Pen Y Fan in the snow and he ate it too fast for photo ops.
Pies are fabby warming winter food, and readymade pastry makes them quick and easy. I don't have the patience to stand and fold and roll my own puff pastry whilst a hungry, wailing toddler attempts to scale my trouser leg, so I make no apologise for my addiction to Jus Rol. Jus don't buy the new low fat puff one. It's not 30% less fat, it's 90% less nice.
The post title is inspired by a friend of mine who shall remain nameless, but knows who she is. In our young, free, single, drunken days she was once famously chatted up in a 2am chip shop queue by an Australian backpacker who led with the classy "Noice tits luv. Can I boi you a poi?". It makes me chuckle every time I make a pie and I am happy to share the mirth.
So, a yummy, creamy, warming chicken pie then? Of course.
Chicken, mushroom and bacon pie
400g chicken, breast or thigh fillet, chopped
1 small punnet mushrooms, chopped
6 thick rashers smoked bacon, chopped
1 onion, finely chopped
approx 2 dessertspoons softened butter or spread
approx 2 dessertspoons plain flour
1 pint chicken stock
1/4 pint milk
tsp mustard seeds
2 tsp chopped garlic (approx 4 cloves)
1/2 tsp crushed black pepper
1 pack ready rolled puff pastry
In a large pan, heat a splash of oil and fry off the onions and chopped bacon. Set aside in a dish. Repeat and brown the chicken and mushrooms together, cookig for about 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Pop in the dish with the onions.
Return the pan to the heat, melt your butter and add your flour, cooking for a minute or two until the paste starts to turn golden and smells nutty. Start adding the liquid a bit at a time - milk first, until it's all gone, then start with the stock. Stir briskly between each addition as the sauce thickens and cooks - keep stirring and lumps will disappear, I promise. When all the liquid is added, throw in the garlic, pepper and mustard seeds and simmer for about five minutes until thick. Add in the contents of your bowl of chicken and whatnot, stir together then tip into an ovenproof dish and top with the pastry, cut to size. Brush with a little milk or beaten egg to glaze and bake for 15-18 minutes in a hot (200, 180 fan) oven until gold and puffed and delicious. Serve with vegetables of your pleasing.
You'll be pleased to know that the chat up line didn't work, incidentally. I mean, would you?